If sex lasts less than one minute after penetration, it is assumed that there is a problem of premature ejaculation. Now, let us look into some facts.

If penetration was possible even for just ten seconds, it was because the vagina was able to dilate and it was lubricated enough and because the penis, regardless of its size, had a normal erection. Then a couple should be grateful instead of being sorrowful. Ten seconds are precious and it is possible for the sperm to reach the egg of a woman within ten seconds and it is possible to fertilize that egg and eventuallly get a baby after nine months. The highest purpose of sex is to make a baby or babies, isn’t it?

There are three types of pleasures in life : pre-pleasure, on-pleasure and post-pleasure. And everybody can feel them at anytime of the day.

Pre-pleasure can be felt if a couple makes an appointment or have sex at a certain time of the day or night, on-pleasure is felt during the intercourse and post-pleasure happens when the couple reflects upon their intercourse anytime after their sex  event.

When you plan a vacation to a foreign country or even locally at the beach or elsewhere, you can feel those three kinds of pleasures in a sequence. Pre-pleasure before you leave, on-pleasure during the trip and the journey, and post-pleasure when you share photos on social media and talk about your vacation to friends and relatives.

If you are invited by Celine Dion or any of your favorite singers or movie stars for a quick photo and a handshake for 7 seconds, would you refuse because it is a too-short-pleasure? I don’t think so. You might hesitate for a few seconds but you wouldn’t refuse. By accepting the invitation, you will feel the three types of pleasure I mentioned earlier. You will feel the post-pleasure for many years from the 7-second event.

Have you ever wondered why a penis is erected? It is due to high quantity of blood that has filled its arteries and veins. Is it good for the large amount of blood to stay in the erected penis for a long period of time? Not really, because blood needs to circulate around the body continuously and carry out its duties. It carries oxygen and nutrients to millions of cells in the body and remove waste. And of course many other functions that I don’t really need to mention here.

When asked about normal sex duration, Dr Debra Herbenick, the director of the center for Sexual Health Promotion at Indiana University in Bloomington said, "There’s no magic number. … It varies from person to person and couple to couple and there’s no normal". Additionally, the World Health Organization has not set any standards for normal sex duration.

Let me end by sharing with you two new vocabularies0 The first is penile priapism: it means a prolonged erection of the penis without sexual stimulation. And the second is clitoral priapism, meaning a prolonged erection of the clitoris, causing engorgement, swelling and pain to the clitoris and adjacent area. As you can see, something that lasts long is not always great.

I have a list of 77 answers to questions about sexuality from a great book. Send your questions toThis email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. if you need free help. One question per person, and be patient, please.