The New York Times estimates that more than 13 million families are headed by single parents in the United states. In most cases, single mothers are the ones who decided to make the big move. Even though their family is seen as unconventional and despite the struggles they face in bearing a family on their own, a large number of do not want to change their unmarried mothers’ status; many women decide not to rely on a partner to have a family. For those women, deciding to stay single does not equal choosing loneliness. It is a matter of building a strong family, showing perseverance, and above all, love.

Why choose to be a single mother?

Separation and divorce remain the principal reasons why women chose the single mother pathway. According to One World Education in Single Parent Families, 49 percent of marriages in the United States end up in divorce and 84 percent of custodial parents – those who acquire legal and physical custody of their child – are mothers. After going through a wrong marriage and broken dreams, many of those divorced moms realize that there would be more in their future. They firmly believe that they can raise their children on their own without men.

Chances are, some women unwillingly become single mothers due to an early death of their partner. They eventually choose to remain single as they prefer bettering and focusing more on the future of their beloved children rather than trying out a new romance!

A lot of women became or stayed single moms because they feel alone. After a long wait, many single women gave up the idea of the charming prince and decide to create the life they want for themselves alone. Physically, financially, and emotionally ready, these women start their journey of being mothers by either looking into egg retrieval and fertility clinics or seeking for sperm donors in a sperm bank. For these women, growing a child – that they want to share their life with – is challenging and complicated but turns out to be a transformative and joyful experience.

According to the US Department of Health and Human Services Children’s Bureau, about 437,000 children lived in a foster care in 2018. Adoption becomes the best alternative for a lot of single women – either divorced without any child or simply never met the right partner – to become moms. In this case, they offer to raise one kid or more from foster care and provide them a happy future.

After her divorce, Trelawney McCoy from Rochester, New York, mother of a single child, adopted eight children from foster care and has cared for more than 20 children in her house. “I just want to help a kid out, to help make them a better person and give them a chance to start a new life, all they need is a start”, McCoy said.

Source: New York Times